Stop looking for love and let it find you.

Deep in thought and I came to the realisation that no matter how much effort you put into trying to connect with a significant other and find “love” , it will never really take off because you are trying too hard, and thats not the way that life works.

Ive learnt this lesson after a series of misfortunate dates and mistakes over the short time I have been on this earth. Its hard when you are feeling lonely to not feel comfortable  and just be alone with yourself.

Being with someone is like a massive safety net, as long as its a decent net, you will expect to feel secure and sound. At the end of the day its something that we all look for, feeling safe. And we end up mistaking the illusion of a safety net for something real when in actual fact its just another long rabbit hole of a situation when we look too hard.

I think that some of us may use our bodies and not our brains to feel close to someone when desperately searching for that person that will make us feel happy, and this is the most tragic mistake of it all.

We should be able to lead with our minds not our bodies and realise that Love is not something to actively go out looking for, sure you should definitely keep an eye out but don’t let that process consume you entirely, you may mistake the fake opportunities for the real ones.

 

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Please Just Dont

I really don’t understand why some people think its ok to touch your body or in some cases restrain you with unwanted sexual advances. Its actually really uncool and classifies as sexual assault.

At a party two weeks ago, I noticed this one lad trying his best to take advantage of some of the intoxication of a few girls by offering them hugs and then letting his hand roam free over their bum cheeks. Something they clearly did not consent to when they could barely consent to standing on their own two feet.

What goes through your mind when you decide its ok to invade someone’s personal space like that ? I genuinely would love to know why some scumbags think it is socially acceptable to just come up to you and touch parts of your body that they think they are entitled to when it is clear that you are in no fit state for that to happen.

I was at a nightclub with a few friends and was approached by this creep in the smoking area outside, I was not interested and politely declined his advancement to hold my hand, my no was somehow translated into a strong  “yes” as he refused to listen and kept hold of my hand and arm as I was trying to walk off.

At this point my friend noticed my plight and very kindly stepped in to reiterate the polite decline I had already issued, to which then he then became volatile and called us both “Arseholes”.

I don’t think he quite realised that the only thing filled with shit was himself.

The night progressed and as I was making my way through the crowd of sweaty humans and thumping music yet again I was prohibited from finding my friends much thanks a group of creeps this time who would not let go of my arm even though it was clear I was moving from point A to get to point B.

Just because you grab onto my arm or my body does not mean I am yours. This is not the pick and mix section in Woolworths.

The point is, just stop. And have a think about how you are making that person feel when you are freely giving yourself access to their body without asking for permission to do so first, also perhaps look up the word “No” in the dictionary and educate yourself on its meaning.

Don’t get me wrong it is perfectly acceptable to approach someone, but do it by using words and starting an actual verbal conversation instead of treating them like a bag you want to carry off. I am not a tesco 5p bag ok. I am a human being.

Hello world!

So I started this blog, mainly because of the lack of anything that exciting, and also because I’d very much like to share my tumultuous journey into the dark dark depths of adulthood, no I’m kidding I’ve always enjoyed writing and what better way to express it with a clichéd blog.