Slut, Slag, Frigid, Loose, Tease, Bitch, Feminazi,Loud.

Growing up, I have constantly been told to cherish my body, treat it like a sacred temple. For my mum this translates into “eating healthy”. Ha. As if Im going to start eating avocado and kale on a daily basis. how stressful.

But it also translates into something else. The idea that I have to conform to society’s idea of a “good girl”. The idea that I as a female am meant to be “non slutty” and “chaste”  because of course if not that equals trash right?

Wrong, Im sick of hearing things like “you don’t want to get a label for yourself” or “don’t sleep around” because of what society and my future husband will apparently think of me. The fact is, it is my body, and how dare you even attempt to try and tell me what I can do with the very vessel I carry around every day.

How dare you try and make me feel bad for expressing myself and choosing a path that you have not chosen. It is ridiculous that I should have to constantly question whether or not what I’m doing in the eyes of others is right or wrong.

Just because I am female it does not give you a right to dictate a certain way I should be behaving. Apparently women are considered sluts for sleeping around, disgusting for not shaving, and a bitch for having an opinion.  But then when a guy behaves in the same manner, he is praised and slapped on the back.

At the same time, looking at women like they are no more than a piece of meat is also disturbingly shit. I am not “frigid” or a “tease” because I don’t want to get off with you. Nor am I “loose” or a “slag” for getting off with you, My body is so much more than you make of it. It carries the scars of my growth. The battle wounds of my past. But most importantly it carries Me. `And you have absolutely no right whatsoever to past judgement on what I do with it.

Some inspiration from a good friend  blog

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Stop looking for love and let it find you.

Deep in thought and I came to the realisation that no matter how much effort you put into trying to connect with a significant other and find “love” , it will never really take off because you are trying too hard, and thats not the way that life works.

Ive learnt this lesson after a series of misfortunate dates and mistakes over the short time I have been on this earth. Its hard when you are feeling lonely to not feel comfortable  and just be alone with yourself.

Being with someone is like a massive safety net, as long as its a decent net, you will expect to feel secure and sound. At the end of the day its something that we all look for, feeling safe. And we end up mistaking the illusion of a safety net for something real when in actual fact its just another long rabbit hole of a situation when we look too hard.

I think that some of us may use our bodies and not our brains to feel close to someone when desperately searching for that person that will make us feel happy, and this is the most tragic mistake of it all.

We should be able to lead with our minds not our bodies and realise that Love is not something to actively go out looking for, sure you should definitely keep an eye out but don’t let that process consume you entirely, you may mistake the fake opportunities for the real ones.